


Light & Fluffy, With a Side of Canadian Bacon

by McKayRulez



Series: Mal Doran McKay [3]
Category: Stargate - All Media Types, Stargate Atlantis, Stargate SG-1
Genre: Cats, Crack, Gen, Pet Names, Pets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-27
Updated: 2019-04-27
Packaged: 2020-02-07 13:40:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 765
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18621766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/McKayRulez/pseuds/McKayRulez
Summary: McKay's first mission with SG-1 and he's already found the team a mascot... Or dinner.. It really depends on the situation...





	Light & Fluffy, With a Side of Canadian Bacon

“Daniel! Look what Male Sam found!” Vala singsonged. 

Dr. Jackson turned around to get a furry creature pushed into his face. He backed away as it started yipping. “…” 

“Isn’t he adorable?” Vala cooed, as the blue eyed scientist gushed and grinned at the young baby creature they were holding. 

Daniel straightened his glasses. “I’m surprised you’re holding it when it could have rabies.” 

McKay scoffed as he gazed adoringly at the creature. “You don’t have rabies? Do you little guy?” 

Vala leaned down at it petting it affectionately. “Do you? No, you don’t!” 

“Rodney, Vala.. Why are you two holding that thing?” Cameron asked as he approached from the woods. 

Rodney looked over at Teal’c pointedly. When he didn’t speak up Vala did instead and tattled. “Teal’c killed bambi's momma, so now we’re gonna look after him!”

“Oh..” Cameron wasn’t expecting that. “Was it an accident?” 

“No.” Teal’c stated bluntly. When Cameron raised an eyebrow, he defended solemnly. “The mother tried to eat me.” 

“Yeah. It was as big as.. Well, I don’t know what exactly.. But it was very big.” Rodney nodded. 

“Like a bear.” Vala added. 

Rodney looked to him. “Or a lion.”

“No. Definitely a bear.” Teal’c agreed with a head tilt. 

Cameron cleared his throat. “And despite this you two think it’s a good idea to raise its baby? Why?” 

“Well.” Rodney stared blankly at him. “Because it’s a kitty.” 

Vala hugged them both. “And it’s adorable! Look into those big eyes!” 

Daniel and Cameron looked at each other for a minute, then Cameron pinched the bridge of his nose. He wished Sam was here instead of this weird guy as her replacement, but with her in Command of the Hammond and Atlantis stationed on the moon, it left him with this nerd. 

“We’re not bring that thing to Earth with us.” 

“Awwwww.” Vala pouted and looked to Daniel for support. He raised his hands wanting to stay out of this. 

“But we can’t just leave it here. It’ll die.” Rodney defended. 

“You don’t know that.” Cameron pointed out.

“Sheppard would never leave a man behind.” 

Cameron’s eyes narrowed. “Well that’s not a ‘man’, and I’m sure he probably wouldn’t bring some creature that he knew could eat him, home either.” 

“Actually, he’s done that before.” Rodney glanced to Vala and Teal’c. “He’s brought wraith prisoners to Atlantis quite a few times actually. Even turned one into a man and named him Michael.”

Cameron looked away annoyed that he was getting compared to Sheppard, and Vala chimed in looking between Teal’c and McKay. “Ooo, Male Sam! Can we name him?” 

“I’m thinking Schrödinger.” Rodney stated with fond eyes. 

“Colonel Carter already named her cat that.” Teal’c admitted. 

Rodney squinted to the side. “Of course she did. She gets all the good names.” 

“How about Scruffles?” Vala asked. 

“Einstein.” Rodney announced. John never let him name anything back on his old team, so he was going to assert his name dominance on this one. 

“No fair! Daniel! Tell Male Sam he’s too new, so he doesn’t get to name him!” Vala pouted at Dr. Jackson who ignored her gaze. 

Rodney’s brows furrowed, as he looked to her. “Why do you keep calling me ‘Male Sam’? I know I’m her replacement, but I have a name afterall.. Well.. A middle name to be exact.” He stated awkwardly. 

She blinked. “Aren’t you just basically a male version of her, but grumpy and selfish?” 

As McKay opened his mouth to retort, Cameron cut in as he waved his hands out exasperated. “We’re not keeping it! So stop trying to name it! T back me up!” 

McKay and Vala looked to each other, then quickly in mental silent agreement, held up the baby to Teal’c face. He stared at in impassively, then looked to Cameron. “It’s... adorable.” Teal’c admitted as he broke to the cuteness. 

“See!” Vala’s eyes lit up. “Even Teal’c wants it.”

“Indeed.”

"Besides, if it tries to eat us, then we get to eat it instead." Rodney shrugged, "So it's a win, win situation." 

“Fine! But I’m not going to be the one to explain to General Landry why we let loose a wild alien creature on the base!” 

 

\-- Twenty minutes later. --

 

Hank took one look at the creature and picked him up. “Awwe. What a cute kitten!” 

Cameron face palmed frustrated. 

Hank looked up at SG-1. “What’s his problem?” 

“He’s just jealous he didn’t get to name it.” McKay explained. 

“Ah. So what is this little guys name then?” 

“Einstein.” 

“Really?.. I was getting more of a Schrödinger vibe.” 

“I know, right?!”


End file.
